The thought of exercising has probably been on your mind for a (very) long time. But even with the constant internal reminders, you haven’t been able to get the habit going. If anything, thinking about it while knowing you don’t have the time or energy might be the most frustrating thing of all.
That’s why at trainwell, we propose quitting. Quitting on the “all or nothing” idea. The one that says exercising again means going back to the gym, signing up for classes, or getting in 45-minute workouts a few times a week.
The truth is that priorities shift in your 40s. So, rather than beating yourself up for trying to do what you did over a decade ago (before big responsibilities and stressors like career advancements, a mortgage, kids, and aging parents), work with where you’re at now.
Working out doesn’t have to mean what it used to. You can slowly add in more movement smartly, in a way that makes it sustainable — and this article will show you how.
It’s easy to compare yourself (especially with social media training our brains to do it constantly). But when you get stuck comparing yourself to others or your past self, you can quite literally get stuck. It’s hard to move forward when you’re looking towards the past.
Except, everything now might feel like it’s harder, making it feel impossible. That’s usually because your body, priorities, and lifestyle have changed overall, and that’s okay; you can find ways to work with that.
Before, fitness might’ve been something you did to lose weight, where you worked out for external goals. Now, you can learn how to approach movement in a way that soothes and supports your body and mind.
Start checking in with how your body feels and use movement to treat your symptoms and mood. For example, stress might mean gentle yoga some days or an intense spin class to release tension other days. Knee pain could mean introducing just a few specific strength training exercises (ones you can do for 10-15 minutes a few times a week).
It’s these little tweaks that add up, giving your body more of what it needs to truly feel better. And the more you choose the type of movement and rest that aligns with where you’re at now, the more likely you are to enjoy it and keep at it.
Starting to work out again is just like dieting; if you force yourself to do what you hate (like running), it just won’t last. Find movement you enjoy that works for you, not against you.
One of the biggest reasons why New Year’s resolutions and goals fail is that we try to do too much — all at once. Working out three times a week isn’t just one goal — it comes with countless other ones. For example, making sure you get enough sleep so you have the energy, prepping snacks or meals so you’re not starving, having clothes and shoes that work for you, and changing your daily routine to make time for it (to name a few).
There’s so much that goes into one goal, making it best to think of all the steps and starting with just the first one to get the habit rolling. That could mean just changing into workout clothes instead of leisure wear when you get home from work, but not even attempting to work out yet. Go habit by habit until you’re ready to pick up the next one. Maybe the next step could just be walking around the block, and nothing more.
When you scale back, you’re more likely to get to the bigger goal and keep it. Because every time you “accomplish” your little step, you get a little dopamine hit (that “Yes! I did it!). And every time that happens, you feel better about yourself, making each little action feel more rewarding. And the more rewarding an action is, the more we want to do it.
Stuck in a cycle of trying to lose weight without getting anywhere? Here’s the trap: You check the scale and decide to start working out again. You begin exercising a few times a week, and meanwhile, you keep hopping back on that scale. Except, you’re not seeing it budge (or worse, it goes up). So naturally, you quit. Because what’s it all for if you’re not losing weight?
If what you’re working out for is a number, you’re giving away your control and disempowering yourself. You’re letting that scale (or the fit of your clothes) rule not only your mood, but how you feel about yourself as a person (and likely with not-so-kind words, like stuck, lazy, a lost cause, etc.).
Focusing on numbers takes all the credit away from not only your effort (something within your control), but also countless other benefits you’re not paying attention to. For example:
So if you’re feeling ready to start moving, look at all the reasons you’d be doing it for, and start paying attention to the little things.
Plus, don’t forget all the benefits going on behind the scenes that set you up for a better, longer quality of life for you and your family. That includes better bone density, mood, immunity, insulin sensitivity, muscle mass, fewer menopause symptoms, and less risk of diabetes, cardiovascular disease, cancer, and early death.
There’s a reason why “willpower” wears out. Pushing yourself to do something that you don’t enjoy just doesn’t last — it’s how our biology works. So rather than fighting with yourself, find ways to use your biology to your advantage. And since we’re incredibly social beings who thrive on accountability, reaching out to get active with others is one of your best bets for staying active (because you’ll also enjoy it more).
Here are some ways you can tie movement into socializing:
Hiring a personal trainer is also one of the best options for consistency, since friends may not always hold you accountable. Plus, if you have friends who cancel often, you’re likely to feel less motivated to go on your own.
The push mentality society runs on enforces the mantra “work now, play later.” Except, rarely do we actually let ourselves play. As soon as we check one thing off the list, there’s one more to do right underneath it. The phrase should really be “work now, maybe some vague reward later that you never celebrate because you’re on to the next” (not so catchy, though).
The rewards we reach for aren’t always tangible or with a date we can look forward to (especially when it comes to weight loss). Plus, it’s really hard for our brains to only think of future rewards when “right now” feels boring, exhausting, or downright painful. And if you have ADHD, that’s even more the case — everything is either “now” or “not now” (hence the procrastination).
One of the best ways to circumvent never-ending goals that lead to giving up or procrastination is to make the action itself a reward. Research shows that people who exercise more regularly are the ones who enjoy exercise more (not surprising).
Here are some ways to give it a try:
We’ve been taught to only celebrate outcomes — pounds lost, miles run, jeans that fit. But those results take time, and if you wait to pat yourself on the back until you hit them, you might lose steam along the way. Instead, start celebrating the effort you put in, because that’s what actually creates the results in the first place. For example:
Coming back to exercise in your 40s isn’t about making up for lost time or chasing your 25-year-old self’s pace. It’s about honoring the body and life you have now, and building strength for the years ahead. No matter how long it’s been, you can shift your mindset to view exercise as something that nourishes you, even if it’s a 5-minute walk to wind down after dinner.
Whether it’s asking a friend to sign up for a Zumba class with you or celebrating a 5-minute morning stretch, lasting change comes from small, tiny steps that align with where you’re at now. That’s why at trainwell, we don’t push you beyond what’s practical, and we make sure to focus on fun.
Our trainers specialize in building realistic, enjoyable fitness plans — particularly for perimenopause. You need a routine that doesn’t drain or bore you, and still helps you reach your goals. So if you’re dreading the gym because you haven’t had the energy to work out in years, you can be sure that your trainer will set you up with something practical and fun, with zero dread.
Curious what kind of plan they could make fun for you? Give it a try with two free weeks here. See the difference their support could make in setting you up for long-term fitness enjoyment that fits your lifestyle.
Written by Jennifer Olejarz.
